So 12-step recovery suggests I find a God (or god) of my own understanding. That’s a hard enough task for your average alcoholic or addict. But when bipolar mania, coupled with psychosis, once had you convinced that you were God… of rather that more obscure member of the Trinity, the Holy Ghost, that is some […]
Yes, I know better. But sometimes I make the mistake of watching the news. Though I swore off drinking 11+ years ago, each time I take a broadcast I get served a toxic cocktail—one-part Anger, one-part Hatred, two-parts Outrage and a splash of Victimhood. In no time, I am on an emotional bender. Anger and […]
My last bipolar manic episode was what my 94-year-old mother would call a “doozey.” (Sure, my Facebook analytics tell me my followers skew Millennial. Perhaps I should express myself in emojis and f-bombs. But I am guessing there isn’t a little icon or string of profanity that could properly describe an episode that still has […]
Once again I was wrong. Once again it was due to my over-inflated belief that my way is the only way. Once again the error of my way was spoken to my heart in a moment of silence. You can call it God, Universal Power, The Inner Guide, Your Higher Self or whatever you please. […]
I did it again. Slick ad on Facebook. A play to my reoccurring feeling of brokenness. A catchy title. Click… PayPal… Click. Three days later it was in my mailbox. Another self-help tome hoping to find a home in my already overcrowded bookshelf. Before it was shelved I read the first four chapters… not bad… […]
As critical as I can be, I actually have very few beefs with organized religion. Sure there are adherents who commit ridiculous, even horrific acts in the name of brand they follow. But I attribute that that to mankind’s unfortunate propensity to twist the good into the out-and-out bad. Putting the most egregious example of this—terrorism—to […]
The one question I wish people would ask me is whether I’d prefer my grandchildren to grow up to be baseball players or gymnasts. Unfortunately I am more likely to be asked: “Do you know who peed in the potted plant on my desk last night?” (True story from my drinking days. I will have […]
Alcoholics and addicts love to talk about being happy, joyous and free. I just sat through a well attended 12-step meeting where this was the topic. The people most inclined to speak on this topic were primarily younger attendees within their first 60 days… “what do they know?” I silently judged before reflecting on how […]
My name is Rick. I am self-centered and fearful. In the past that has fueled my alcoholism and complicated my mental illness. For alcohol, according to our literature, is but a symptom. The underlying spiritual malady is self-centered fear. Knowing this, I embarked on a little experiment. Nine days ago I reviewed Steps 6 and […]
Drunk almost daily since my sophomore year of college, it took some time to graduate… twenty-two years to be precise. Though there were multiple starts and stops (sometimes the bottle was a little more important than attendance) and though I changed my major more frequently than my fashion-conscious wife changes her nail polish, one thing […]
Copyright © 2013-14 ~ A Double Shot of Recovery ~ All Rights Reserved
